Why is it that every word someone says to me feels like I am being judged? It is so interesting that I catch myself feeling this way quite often. For example, I was invited to join a focus group to discuss how we can help someone with sight-loss, who call on the phone-helpline, with mental health issues. I started wondering why I was being invited to this and whether I needed help myself because I was lacking in some way. To be fair, why should I know how to recognise if someone has a mental health issue unless they actually say that they do and need help with it? As it turned out we were being offered training by an outside body so that we can pick up on this, and learn some tools to deal with it.
I have noticed that no matter how confident I may be in a particular matter, there is an underlying sense of responsibility to always get things right. This is a sure way to set oneself up for failure! After all, isn’t life experiences meant to teach us? Even knowing this, the initial unconscious response is of self doubt. It must take life times to become aware of these ingrained poor self opinions. I think a lot of us are sailing in the same boat, but perhaps on different seas.
I have heard that we build our self image in childhood. It would be so encouraging when young parents understand this and become aware of the language that is being used in front of their children; the ‘can’ do rather than can’t do or don’t do reprimands that are so common in the way we bring up our next generation. Only then will we see a change and make us kinder to each other.
Blinding Truths 