82. Devotion to Self

The journey of self discovery starts with the practice of devotion to self.

Quite a statement… isn’t it? On the surface, this may sound egotistical when viewed from a material plane. However, every journey of self discovery has to take a deep dive into the unknown of our inner world. This inner space can open up aspects of ourselves that can be bewildering and difficult to comprehend. However, I think there could be rich rewards when we determine to see with a lens of self compassion, detached curiosity and willingness to just allow whatever surfaces from our shadow depths. It takes courage to acknowledge and accept our imperfections, hence not many have the patience to embark on this process.

The last two months have been just this kind of journey for me. The first month involved a practice of remaining aware of my own thoughts, emotions and responses to all the activities and people I was encountering. I was keen to experience some inner progress that would enable an enhanced perception of life. However, what I had not bargained for was the deep intense detoxification through physical illness and pain by the second month!  It feels like a ‘reset’ button had been pressed that has removed many past limiting beliefs. 

The ability to accept and laugh at my fear, physical pain and feeling of helplessness is a gem worth discovering. All the theorising of many philosophical discussions pale into insignificance once even a little nugget of self-acceptance is glimpsed. Denial and resistance of our faults stops any hope of knowing who we really are and the magnificence of what resides within each of us. It appears that joy and tranquillity can be a dominant experience once we live our lives from the inside out!