66. The Need to be Right

When observing many interactions objectively, I have often found them quite enlightening. Depending on the people’s personal dynamics, they either result in amicable agreement, an impasse or an argument. The undertone is often directed by who feels more strongly to prove that they are right. It makes me wonder just why do we need other people’s validation, to convince us that we are correct in our opinions?

We all adhere to certain belief systems that influence our choices in the way we live our lives. However, when any of these beliefs are questioned, we automatically look for justifications and reasons to defend them… whether they are appropriate or not. This is understandable as otherwise the familiar ground we have stood on so far, starts to feel unstable. Perhaps this is the reason why it is said that it takes a generation to bring in any change.

Indeed, whenever I have been challenged for any thoughts or opinions I have expressed, my instinct has been to try to defend them. However, I now realise that it is not always necessary to do so. It is more beneficial to remain open to the challenge and check if there is any wisdom to it. If there is, take it on board. If not, decline it. Otherwise, I would be wasting energy by trying to justify myself to convince someone else to my way of thinking. After all, it may have taken years to arrive at our conclusions, so why expect others to agree when they may have experienced differently? I have come to a place where most of the time I no longer feel the need to be proven right, as long as I know that I am!

“A man convinced against his will…is of the same opinion still”.